“A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words”. Now that I forget the words, who sings for me? No one.

On one day afternoon, I read it on someone messenger status. This someone is not just any particular someone but, she’s someone very precious for me. A very good friend.
And today, we’re in the middle of our cold fight *again*
It was very hurts to read that when you in this uncomfortable situation and when you though you were so useless to her and don’t know who you are in her life.
I feel like crying. Well, my mind did. My heart too. But I tried so hard not to let tears run down in my face. I’m at the office and in the middle of deadline.
But I can’t help it. It really hurts so badly.
I don’t know where to turn my heart to and ease this pain.
Those words like thousands knifes stab directly to your heart. It’s bleeding so badly.
She never considers me as anything. Now I see that.
She never considers me the way I feel about her.
Now I see it…
That I am useless, stupid, mean, egoist, worst, and still lining other words of complaining.
I maybe hurt and bleeding but I know I hurt her more and make her in pain worst than I feel.
What kind of friend I am?
To make myself more fool, instead of talking in nice, warmth, comforting way to her. I talk in madness and push her in the edge… again.
Aaah I’m such a worst person, right?
I really don’t know what to do now.
So afraid to hurt her more than she already was. But can’t stand the situation at all.
*crying in outloud*